Administrivia: 27 May 2022

A site based in Glasgow ran a thing on Facebook recently listing forty things every Glaswegian has done at least once and asking its followers how many they’d done. I don’t know anything about that, but I did see “bought something at Tam Shepherds Trick Shop” in the list and thought, “yep, I know of someone who’s done that one.”

That’s basically on my short list for Glasgow if I ever get to visit. I don’t believe I will run into the big man there, but knowing he’s been there probably about a billion times will make the visit extra fun.

(No, I will not ask the proprietors if they remember Rory going in there. Maybe they would, maybe they wouldn’t, who knows?)

Actually, if I ever do go, it occurs to me I could do a little tour of places I know he’s been and, like, share them here or something. Maybe not where we know he has docked — that feels a little much like photographing someone’s house — but other places, like maybe his old forestry school or something. I dunno… if such a trip ever becomes feasible, I’ll give it a good think. Set up an itinerary. You never know.


So much quiet on the fandom front as far as new photos on Instagram, unless people are not tagging said photos. Which, I probably suggested that approach at some point, so here I go shooting myself in the foot. Honestly though, I don’t look all that often. The fan edits are a bit of a turnoff, especially the SanSan stuff. Especially the SanSan stuff incorporating, say, photos from his time in The Irregulars. Good lord. Moving on now.


Job search not going so well. I was going to joke about “quit sending me bad thoughts” but it wouldn’t have come off as a joke even though I really would be kidding. It’s not as bad as all that. I do have income. It even turns out you can put your Uber rideshare-driving or food delivery on your Indeed résumé and it’ll get people’s attention. But it’s this weird balancing act trying to work out livable income versus tolerable working conditions. I’m middle-aged, I’m fat, I’m deconditioned (get too tired and sore too easily, a problem I should be fixing in my personal time instead of in the workplace where I’d just slow everyone down), I’m still in my reproductive years but with defective equipment, I’m prone to migraines at inconvenient times, and my feet are too wide for dress shoes. All these things take me off various hypothetical eligibility lists and it’s sort of maddening.

An example: I think I mentioned here I was in the running for a valet driver job at a hospital. I may not have been that specific but that’s what it was. I found out the hard way that I still have anxiety issues when I suddenly had to contend with finding my way around a hospital (it is a literal CAMPUS) whose landscape has considerably changed in twenty years while only having had one day’s introduction to where everything was, and that wasn’t even the worst thing. The worst thing was the aforementioned reproductive health issues and I would have been driving people’s nice cars with light-colored upholstery. Two words: fibroid tumors. Riiiiight. You get it now. Or you ladies over the age of 30 do, anyway. Ya feelin’ me? I’m sure fuckin’ feelin’ me, and I don’t like what I’m feelin’ on days one and two and sometimes three. Which coincided with the job starting. I was very, very lucky, nothing gross happened, but we’re back to the drawing board anyway because that was never going to work until I actually went into menopause. And that could take another ten years. Who fucking knows?

Tackling the problem would take insurance, and I am not of the “just yank it out” school of gynecology; my mother did that, and she suffered for a long time afterwards. (That one organ holds up a lot of other stuff. When it’s gone… well.) I rate nothing better than Medicaid at this point, and they ARE of the “yank it out” school of gynecology. I would need real insurance before anyone would consider anything else. Which requires… A JOB. Which I cannot seem to secure because Issues. Gah.

Oh yeah, taking the Pill every single day. Someone will suggest that. I’m 48, have a personal history of migraine, and lost three of my four grandparents to cerebrovascular (blood vessels in the brain) events (died from stroke or aneurysm). In a word: No. Moving on now.

I go through alternating phases of being really depressed about all this and then feeling like maybe I will figure it out. Weirdly, my odd little hobby here helps. No, not the looking at pics or videos to cheer myself up bit. The knowing Rory has led an unconventional life bit. Granted, he is a dude, so his health issues are very different (if he has any), and he’s never had kids, and he’s never gone through a divorce as far as we know. But he’s lived on the margins, and he pulled through. I think it takes a certain amount of being willing to adjust to where you are instead of spending all your time crying and envying other people because their situation is so different than yours. I mean, you’re going to do that anyway, because we’re all human and envy is part of the human condition, but you can’t let it cripple you. Then you really won’t be able to help anything.

Also, I recently found out that my city has an ordinance wherein if you have a legal source of income you cannot be discriminated against as a prospective tenant just because that income might not be a regular paycheck. I am curious to see how far this protection extends. I do need a so-called permanent address (I don’t understand how something is a permanent address when you don’t own it) for things like not relying on my daughter’s dad for my important mail anymore, and I’d rather have the legal protection a lease provides. But it’s not a matter of EITHER get an apartment OR be on the street. So I’m gonna keep plugging along and see where I end up. Might be interesting. You never know.

I know for a fact that as my own boss I will let myself take as many restroom breaks as I need to take and I won’t dock my own pay or fire myself for it. So there.

Okay. Enough oversharing. Need sleep now. I need to organize my days better, and then maybe I can get a whole lot of shit updated here all at once. No promises.

Administrivia: 17 May 2022

“Holy shit,” say you Americans stopping by, “she got one in early!”

Nah. Am up late and couldn’t be bothered pretending I’d written this on Monday.

I have been rewatching NuWho. Or, I should say, “new” Doctor Who, 2005 and onward. I have… reasons… that I got started, involving the possession of about four seasons (series)’ worth of episodes on my hard drive. Ahem. I don’t know how they were acquired. No, I really don’t know, but if you would be so kind as to wait until after the first week of November this year to ask him, I’m sure my daughter’s dad would be thrilled to enlighten you. I never learned about that shit.

Not for television episodes.

(I said that out loud, didn’t I.)

ANYWAY, we’re up to Eleventh Doctor now, Matt Smith. I cannot say he is my favorite Doctor but he definitely makes top three. I don’t know how Smith pulled off Grumpy Old Man when he was literally the youngest man (excepting possibly Peter Davison?) to take on the role, but he managed it. Brilliant.

I mention all this because last night I saw “Vincent and the Doctor.” Reader, I have lost count of how many times I have seen “Vincent and the Doctor” and it still makes me goddamn cry at the end. If you’ve seen it you know EXACTLY what I am talking about*.


But that’s not even the point. The POINT is that there are, count ’em, TWO actors in that episode who have acted in other things with Rory McCann!

(1) Tony Curran, who was with him in Beowulf and Grendel (and there’s a quite amusing play-fight scene between the two);

Wait a minute. Why isn't he flinching???

and (2) Karen Gillan, who faced off against him in Jumanji: The Next Level.

You really wonder how much they cracked jokes between takes...

There was a little bit in “Vincent and the Doctor” that somehow I did not catch the import of, all the other umpty-billion times I have seen this episode and cried at it, in which Vincent Van Gogh remarks to Amy Pond that her accent sounds like his and, “Are you from Holland, like me?” Well, the actors are both Scottish! It’s an in-joke. I would not be surprised, in fact, if Scottish show-runner Steven Moffat made Richard Curtis, the writer, add that bit as a Scottish in-joke. Thanks to Rory getting me interested in Scotland**, in fact, I have reason to believe this is typical of Scottish humor. Y’know, when they try to be subtle. And of course, with us dumb untraveled sorts of Americans, it usually works.


Mind you, Tony Curran is from Glasgow and Karen Gillan is from Inverness (near Loch Ness) so technically they wouldn’t have THE EXACT SAME accent, in fact Glaswegians sound odd even to a lot of other Scots. But close enough, I suppose. I hadn’t even realized he was Scottish the first umpty-billion times I saw this; this time around was after three solid years’ worth of learning more about Scotland, and now I can pick up on the accents (yep, lots, not just one) more easily and of course, by this point I had seen B&G and knew that the director had grabbed a bunch of Scotsmen for the main roles. Another in-joke, I bet, as many times as Vikings had invaded Scotland centuries ago and left, erm, “presents” behind for the young women…

Meanwhile, Rory, if you’re reading this and you’ve never seen Doctor Who? Watch this one. Curran in particular is brilliant. You’ll be proud of him. (Do you ever go drinking with him anymore??? GO DRINKING WITH HIM. I bet he misses you.)

Anyway. One more thing: I don’t know if you noticed, but there’s another actor in this episode who’s also been in something with Rory McCann, though they never appeared together onscreen. See if you can spot him. There. That narrows it down a bit…

*Don’t watch this just yet, big man. Wait wait wait, keep reading.

**That’s right, big man. It’s all your fault. Mwah.

Administrivia: 12 May 2022

The other day my usual eBay alerts went off, including the one for Rory. It’s usually autographed stuff which I can’t afford, and I already have his autograph anyway. This time someone had something a bit more interesting.

It got here today.

BBC Warriors miniseries DVD!

Aside from the indie short Jack ‘n’ Jill, this is probably the closest Rory ever got to top billing. (He will, of course, have top billing when the DCI Daley television series is produced.) I’ve seen some articles reviewing his segment in particular and they panned it, but it wasn’t so much his acting as the way the whole thing was written. I’m just happy to have one more piece of his back library. As it is, I watch his stuff sparingly. Yes, that’s right, I don’t sit here with eyes glued to the laptop screen each and every night drooling on my keyboard and obsessing over him. But I do enjoy looking at him and listening to him talk (sigh). If the story’s good, that’s just a bonus.

I’m gonna try this one more time and if the same thing happens again I’m gonna stop talking about my job hunt. Okay. Funny thing happened on the way to the Coliseum. I found this job in Indeed that looked interesting, so I applied through the site. TEN MINUTES LATER, I SHIT YOU NOT, some random person texted me directly on my phone (where else) to ask if I’d be interested in coming in for an interview to a completely different place. What?!!?!? Seriously? Later during the interview, as there was another interviewee in the room a couple tables over, I realized they had probably been searching Indeed for resumes that included some sort of driving work. I had added my delivery driving to mine on a whim. Nice whim. I may be working by this time next week, full-time, real employee instead of a temp. Huh.

Actually, both jobs look good. I’m just leaving it up to fate. The valet job is just about a done deal pending background check, but I always put people to sleep with those. I should hear something from the office job by Monday. If I don’t get that I have valet driving. Not my own car, of course (given what a valet driver does). I’m torn, though, if both employers say yes because I’d love an office job again but the valet driver thing pays you 50 cents per car you park on top of normal wages rather than those ridiculously reduced wages the federal government allows employers to pay waitstaff in restaurants. Plus, if someone tips me, I get to keep that too. So it’s like, the base pay might be the same in both places but it’s clear where the extra good stuff is. It’ll come down, I suspect, to who wants to pay me more at base level and how badly I want to stop having to run around all the time. Pretty sad actually.

But! If both of them say no after I wrote about it here then I’m done talking about my job-searching here. And DON’T SEND ME BAD THOUGHTS just because you’re tired of my nattering. That’s not funny.

[removes tongue from cheek]

And speaking of delivery driving, neighborhoods with British placenames are weirdly common around here. That said, today I went through this neighborhood where the side streets had Scottish placenames. Like Loch Lomond. And Troon. Which was where the customer lived. Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha

I remember one night a while back, my destination was either on or near a street named Tennyson. I mean okay, Alfred, but any Rory McCann fan thinks of another name first…

Tennyson Torch, of course!


I have never wanted to be a mouthguard so badly in my entire life.


I said that out loud, didn’t I.

Okay! Off to bed soon. It’s been a long damn day.

Administrivia: 04 May 2022

I ran across this last night (or so… I’m losing track) and hadn’t watched the whole thing so was pleased I’d found it. I still haven’t watched the whole thing, but I probably will at some point.

It is even potentially Rory-screencap material because he shows up several times. If the whole version of this vid isn’t in my Game of Thrones 1-8 boxed set then I know where to come back and find it.

It is one thing to see still photos of him or clips of his acting (or his actual work) and quite another to see him in candid situations. I have to say it cheers me up a lot, too, which I need a bit more lately. That’s right, big man. You are something to look forward to. I’m short on that anymore.

Administrivia: 01 May 2022

Holy shit, we’re into month five already. Where did the year go? Let me tell you, young’uns, if you think life is too slow right now, just you wait. The older you get, the faster it will fly by and the less you will want it to do that.

I used to know these people who made a big deal out of May Day, and I don’t mean Communists. One of them once wrote something like this:

Hip, hip, hooray, it’s the first of May!
Outdoor loving begins today!

You get the idea. Although I don’t recommend much of this to anyone living in western Scotland. Wee flying biting beasties in sensitive places. Ow.

So, I got a nice surprise from Uncle Sam. I don’t quite understand the whole thing myself but it has to do with some weird shit they did with the tax code last year. Chalk it up to something else Former House Male probably misled me about; he’d told me I got a stimulus payment, and I always thought that was weird because I got zero independent notification about it. I suspect HE got the payment and then passed it on to me so I wouldn’t feel left out, as he’d already gotten one or two of them. Just part of the overall mindfuck inherent in having that man in my life at all; one minute he was doing adorably considerate stuff like that, the next you realized he was lying through his teeth about it and found yourself wondering why in the world anyone would do that. Be that as it may. I filed for last year because I had made some money delivery-driving and the question came up. “You would have gotten a letter from the IRS,” the tax-filing site said. I never got a letter from the IRS, so I clicked “no.” Okay, we’ll be sending you fourteen hundred dollars in your refund. Do what? Okay. I’m not arguing.

So I waited on tenterhooks half expecting them to send me a message going “Psych! You’re getting forty-something dollars instead!” But it never happened. Instead I got a notification from PayPal (I can have stuff deposited to PayPal exactly like it’s a bank account now, routing number and everything) and it was even a day or two early.

That was two days before Rory’s birthday, actually, so the 22nd. Room fee, phone bill, full tank of gas for once (that was nearly sixty bucks, I believe), food at more than subsistence level, occasional frivolous purchase (like, a couple used books from Half Price Books)… and I’m about to pay for the room again. Not doing too badly though. I’m about to embark on a bit of an experiment with a different delivery service and if I like what I earn with them I may just stick with that for a while. I’ve been wanting to try them for ages but they don’t allow instant payouts and I was in a place where I really needed those, but I have some breathing room now so I’ll just go for it and see what happens. If I really like how the revenue looks, I’ll also move to a different location of the weekly motel I’m staying in where the roads are better and the restaurants more numerous and the student population is closer by. The room will be a little more expensive, say an additional $30-50 range per week, but if I like my income well enough to move I figure it will all average out.

It’s not exactly living on a boat, but it’s definitely interesting.

I also took up cross-stitching because I miss crafting and it’s relatively cheap (pro tip to the Americans: Do not buy DMC floss from JoAnn Fabrics; it is shockingly overpriced. I didn’t, opting for the inexpensive floss instead, and I hate it by comparison, but it’ll work) and I’m already trying to think up pottymouthed pattern ideas. I’ve actually designed cross-stitch before, for a co-worker who was really into Holly Hobbie and couldn’t find any patterns, but that was back in the mid-nineties. I don’t have that software anymore, but graph paper’ll do it.

Do you suppose anyone’s done embroidery of the Hound? I’ve seen digital work, graphite drawing, probably charcoal, definitely ink, paintings, wood-burning, and sculpture so far. Uh, and crochet, and a sewn art doll — Sandor the Seafarer, who is adorable, by the way. I don’t think I’ve seen anything on Aida cloth though. Hm.

Not that I need any more projects right now.

Not that that’ll stop me if I come up with a good idea. You never know.